During the past 72 hours, the news in the U.S. and in the world has been moving at breakneck speed. This week alone, Coronavirus was labeled as a global pandemic, Wall Street experienced historic losses, many schools in the U.S. have closed for an undetermined amount of time, people were encouraged to work from home as much as possible, all major entertainment and sporting events have been canceled and there has been a ban on travel from much of Europe to the U.S.
The situation is changing so rapidly. Some of us can’t even focus on work as we stare at Twitter updates all day. On top of that experts predict things will get worse before they get better. So, if you are feeling an extra level of stress in your day, that is completely understandable! I know I have a serious case of TMJ developing from clenching my jaw all day and night. Adding kids to the mix makes that stress level even higher. It’s not enough to deal with these worries by themselves, but now many of us have our bored and stressed out kids home all day as well. Here are a few guidelines to getting through the coming days with kids at home due to school closings from coronavirus.
Create an open dialogue
It’s hard not to be anxious right now so it would be unfair to assume our kids aren’t anxious. While we often won’t know the answers, we also don’t know the questions. Don’t assume you know what your kids are worried about. Ask them to talk about it. While grown ups are generally worried about things like how we will get food?, and what to do if we get sick?, and how will I support my family if I can’t work?, kids are probably worried about things that wouldn’t occur to you. Like the logistics of seeing their friends – can they go to a friends house?, can their friends come over?, what will happen to so and so’s birthday party? Or that concert I’ve been waiting for months to go to?
Create an opportunity each day to check in with your kids mental health. If you ask, and the answer you get is “fine”, try asking more specific questions. Perhaps “What’s the best/worst part about being home all day?”, “What’s the scariest part about coronavirus?” and “What do you think causes the spread of coronavirus?”. Know your facts beforehand and give them clear and honest answers. Try asking them what they would like to get out of their extra time at home. Or about a project they have been wanting to do but haven’t had the time for. Having these conversations in my house usually generates an idea or two. Encourage them to write them down in a note on their phone. This way, when they are looking for something to do, they can refer back to the list.
Set up a routine
Right now everything is uncertain. We could all use a little structure but it is especially beneficial for kids. Whether they are in pre-school, grade school or teens in high school, the most important thing you can do is set up a routine.
Start with an anchor in your day. Find two things to do that happen every day and make it consistent. For example, for 2-3 hours every day, they will work on educational activities. For 2 hours everyday there will either be a family activity or permitted screen time, or a walk outside.
Educational activities are more effective in the morning so start the day there. Let kids take advantage of some of the things they can’t do at school, like sleep a little later, or do their work in their PJ’s.
Some online learning suggestions
Preschool kids will find it easiest to be home all day as it is probably not that disruptive to their schedule
Elementary school kids can work in workbooks, do puzzles, read and work on learning based programs online.
Middle grade students can work on online schooling (if your school has set that up), read a book, practice a foreign language using apps like Babbel or Duolingo and online based learning programs like the one’s recommended here.
High school students can read a book, work on online schooling, or work on learning a foreign language using apps like Babbel or Duolingo. They can study for year end exams (like Regents exams in NY) or College entrance exams (SAT/ ACT). Also, they can research a subject that is interesting to them and write a list of 10 new facts they learned about that subject. We like Wide Open School for out of school learning.
After their morning school work is complete, and there has been a break for lunch, you can focus on a 2 hour block of time for either their own screen time or a family activity. Family activities can include a walk in a low-population outdoor space like a park or around the neighborhood, a board game, or a movie. For teens, try to create a little family competition to get them in the spirit. Design a bake-off to see who can create the best dessert. Or for all ages, a hunt around the house to find one object beginning with every letter of the alphabet. You and the kids can write notes or make little trinkets for a nursing home where visitors have been banned.
Give everyone their own space
No matter how big or small your home is, everyone needs their own corner to retreat to for a bit each day. If your child has their own room, let them shut the door and close out the world for a bit. If they don’t have their own room, carve out a piece of the house where they can go to be left alone. Most importantly, be gentle with one another. Patience, kindness and forgiveness are going to be the keys to getting through this current crisis. That, and washing your hands.
Plan your next vacation
When this crisis is done, the world will need us travelers more than ever! So start thinking about where you want to go. We always spend months planning our vacations and it has become a family tradition that we play this game. Try getting everyones mind off of social distancing by making a game of planning your next family trip. Then read this post and this one and for our tricks to packing and surviving traveling with kids.
Definitely would need lots of patience to get through all of this. But that’s for the great good, so it’s worth it.
Absolutely! Stay healthy.